媽媽跟老婆想法不同 - 婚姻
By Charlotte
at 2011-11-14T12:37
at 2011-11-14T12:37
Table of Contents
大家好~~想請教已經結婚的各位版友
如果太太跟媽媽的觀念不同要怎麼辦??
情況是這樣的
我的外婆於前天半夜過逝 享年89歲~
昨天早上一大早帶了太太跟寶寶過去見婆婆最後一面.
寶寶現在剛要滿一歲.
我太太本來不太想帶寶寶過去 覺得寶寶太小 不適合去這種場面
可是我們家是覺得這已經是見最後一面了 如果連這時候都不帶寶寶來
可能以後永遠也見不到.
所以還是把他們都帶去了.
當然~太太跟寶寶並沒有幫忙些什麼 只是人到了外婆家而已.
而舅舅一家也跟寶寶互動得不錯.大家也聊了些關於小孩的經驗談.
後來葬儀社的人派車來將遺體運往二館
我太太跟我說寶寶能不能不要跟去 因為那裡不太適合
我去跟我爸媽講 後來他們也說好 我就跟太太留下來協助工作人員佈置靈堂
其他人都一起跟著送外婆到二館去.
晚上回到家(我跟太太在外面住)
太太說要去吃飯 因為寶寶15號生日 飯店她早已訂好
要請她爸媽跟姐姐一家以及妹妹全家一起為寶寶慶祝週歲.
雖然我是覺得寶寶生日沒必要搞這麼大場面 而且外婆也才剛走
現在辦這樣的活動不是很妥當.
但是基於她飯店是早就訂好的 而且平日白天也是她爸媽幫我們帶小孩
晚上下班我們才接回家帶
所以這個飯局 也算是感謝她爸媽幫忙帶寶寶的辛勞.
基此 我也不便多說些什麼 就一起去吃個飯吧!
只是我們沒有跟我爸媽講有這樣一個飯局 因為現在講這個 個人感覺並不是很妥當..
晚上吃飯 大家還是聊得很開心
我頂多陪著笑 很少發言 因為一手把我帶大的外婆走了.. 真的沒什麼心情聊天了.
吃過飯後 所有人還一起到我岳父家裡切蛋糕 大家玩得很HIGH
我吃過蛋糕後 還是很安靜的看著他們有說有笑
我太太說要不要我先回去休息 她晚點就回來
我說好 所以我就先回去了
大概晚上快11點 我太太也回來了 寶寶放在她媽媽那邊過夜
說是因為外面太冷 寶寶也睡了 不太方便把他帶回來.
\
今天早上 大家出門上班
我媽媽打電話來 跟我說11/23一大早要辦公祭.
我們都要出席
我說沒問題
打了電話給我太太 跟她說到時候要請個假出席
寶寶也要帶去
她說為什麼要帶寶寶去?她覺得這種場合不適合帶寶寶去
然後就跟我說昨天晚上寶寶一直哭鬧 在她媽媽家 怎麼哄也沒效
哭哭鬧鬧到半夜4點多累了 才睡~~
說可能是有一些被嚇到之類的~~
所以她不想讓寶寶出席.
我說當天大家要一起到二館時 已經體諒我們 沒有要我們跟著去了
這次是要辦告別式 就這一次 以後也不會再有機會見到外婆~
應該要帶寶寶一起去 而且長輩也交待要帶寶寶一起來
太太就覺得我們家的觀念很不可思議
她們家是一切以小孩為主 小的最大. 所有大人都要配合小孩.
我們家是長輩的話比較重要 除非真的做不到或是有很大的困難 否則都盡量配合.
觀念的問題 沒有絕對的對錯
但是遇到這種意見分岔的時候 溝通真的很累~~
現在太太說要打電話跟我媽媽講這件事~~
電話還沒打~~可能她還在想要怎麼講~~
想請教版上各位朋友
這樣的狀況 要怎麼解決呢?
大家有沒有什麼建議或看法可以提供參考一下呢?
先謝謝大家的指教!!
--
如果太太跟媽媽的觀念不同要怎麼辦??
情況是這樣的
我的外婆於前天半夜過逝 享年89歲~
昨天早上一大早帶了太太跟寶寶過去見婆婆最後一面.
寶寶現在剛要滿一歲.
我太太本來不太想帶寶寶過去 覺得寶寶太小 不適合去這種場面
可是我們家是覺得這已經是見最後一面了 如果連這時候都不帶寶寶來
可能以後永遠也見不到.
所以還是把他們都帶去了.
當然~太太跟寶寶並沒有幫忙些什麼 只是人到了外婆家而已.
而舅舅一家也跟寶寶互動得不錯.大家也聊了些關於小孩的經驗談.
後來葬儀社的人派車來將遺體運往二館
我太太跟我說寶寶能不能不要跟去 因為那裡不太適合
我去跟我爸媽講 後來他們也說好 我就跟太太留下來協助工作人員佈置靈堂
其他人都一起跟著送外婆到二館去.
晚上回到家(我跟太太在外面住)
太太說要去吃飯 因為寶寶15號生日 飯店她早已訂好
要請她爸媽跟姐姐一家以及妹妹全家一起為寶寶慶祝週歲.
雖然我是覺得寶寶生日沒必要搞這麼大場面 而且外婆也才剛走
現在辦這樣的活動不是很妥當.
但是基於她飯店是早就訂好的 而且平日白天也是她爸媽幫我們帶小孩
晚上下班我們才接回家帶
所以這個飯局 也算是感謝她爸媽幫忙帶寶寶的辛勞.
基此 我也不便多說些什麼 就一起去吃個飯吧!
只是我們沒有跟我爸媽講有這樣一個飯局 因為現在講這個 個人感覺並不是很妥當..
晚上吃飯 大家還是聊得很開心
我頂多陪著笑 很少發言 因為一手把我帶大的外婆走了.. 真的沒什麼心情聊天了.
吃過飯後 所有人還一起到我岳父家裡切蛋糕 大家玩得很HIGH
我吃過蛋糕後 還是很安靜的看著他們有說有笑
我太太說要不要我先回去休息 她晚點就回來
我說好 所以我就先回去了
大概晚上快11點 我太太也回來了 寶寶放在她媽媽那邊過夜
說是因為外面太冷 寶寶也睡了 不太方便把他帶回來.
\
今天早上 大家出門上班
我媽媽打電話來 跟我說11/23一大早要辦公祭.
我們都要出席
我說沒問題
打了電話給我太太 跟她說到時候要請個假出席
寶寶也要帶去
她說為什麼要帶寶寶去?她覺得這種場合不適合帶寶寶去
然後就跟我說昨天晚上寶寶一直哭鬧 在她媽媽家 怎麼哄也沒效
哭哭鬧鬧到半夜4點多累了 才睡~~
說可能是有一些被嚇到之類的~~
所以她不想讓寶寶出席.
我說當天大家要一起到二館時 已經體諒我們 沒有要我們跟著去了
這次是要辦告別式 就這一次 以後也不會再有機會見到外婆~
應該要帶寶寶一起去 而且長輩也交待要帶寶寶一起來
太太就覺得我們家的觀念很不可思議
她們家是一切以小孩為主 小的最大. 所有大人都要配合小孩.
我們家是長輩的話比較重要 除非真的做不到或是有很大的困難 否則都盡量配合.
觀念的問題 沒有絕對的對錯
但是遇到這種意見分岔的時候 溝通真的很累~~
現在太太說要打電話跟我媽媽講這件事~~
電話還沒打~~可能她還在想要怎麼講~~
想請教版上各位朋友
這樣的狀況 要怎麼解決呢?
大家有沒有什麼建議或看法可以提供參考一下呢?
先謝謝大家的指教!!
--
Tags:
婚姻
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at 2012-12-16T02:46
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at 2013-01-16T12:52
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at 2013-01-17T07:47
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at 2013-01-20T21:05
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at 2013-01-27T10:10
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at 2013-01-28T14:42
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at 2013-01-29T17:25
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