老公只喜歡DIY 卻不喜歡實戰 - 婚姻

By Olivia
at 2017-07-05T22:32
at 2017-07-05T22:32
Table of Contents
是否同意記者抄文:NO
背景說明:
和老公交往1年半 結婚快兩年
老公的工作一個月會出差一個禮拜
有一個小孩 目前懷孕中期
跟公婆住 隔音算好
正文開始:
因為跟老公認識很久了
婚前就在他家同居了一年
這段時間性生活頻率約 1次/週
我是還可以接受
只是相較之下我的性慾好像略高於他
後來發現他其實DIY次數約是4~5次/週……
婚後懷孕了
因為比計畫來得早
他感覺一時無所適從
之後每次我明示暗示他
都以我懷孕為由拒絕了
到中期他可能也禁不起我的多次要求
有同意了幾次 這段時間頻率約為 1次/月
每次結束後問他的感覺
他都是說很爽阿 或 超爽的阿
其實這段時間內我試著和他溝通好多次
是不愛我了?還是因為我懷孕的關係?
前幾次他總是很生氣不願溝通
後來我真的覺得自己很委屈
邊哭邊告訴他 我覺得性生活對我很重要
他才願意跟我談
但是他的回答是
他怕實戰自己會表現不好
會想要再多撐一下(因此很常一半軟掉)
他覺得壓力很大
但我其實沒有要求過他要多久
我還說做太久其實我還會不舒服
感覺是他給自己的壓力
生完小孩後 因為餵母奶我比較沒有需求
到產後四個月才開機
這中間他都自己DIY
我看著 是覺得他很樂在其中……
好不容易開機了
我慢慢恢復性慾
但他卻又像之前一樣
我跟他要 總是拒絕
理由是:昨天有DIY/累了改天/怕吵醒女兒
其他我忘記了 這幾個是最常聽到的
我還是很常找機會跟他談
而且覺得自己很委屈每次都聲淚俱下
我問他是有愛上別人嗎?
是因為我生完小孩身材走樣嗎?(161/60)
還是沒有新鮮感?
還是DIY頻率太高影響實戰慾望?
或是太缺乏運動?
總之把我爬文能看到的理由都說了
情趣內衣挑逗甚麼的招式都試過了
有時主動坐上他會生氣把我推開
也跟他溝通了很多次
他說不是因為身材的關係
有時候就是只想DIY 實戰很累
(我心裡os 你的sometimes也太often了吧)
就這樣大概 1次/月的頻率
在計畫中我懷了第二胎
一直到今天吧
婆婆剛好把小孩帶開
我說是不是到房間玩一下
就開始解他衣褲
他說不要這樣 昨天有DIY
我說你不是能連續兩天嗎
他就說前天也有
我就說你今天就算不給我 也是會自己來吧
他就沉默
我也沉默了
我真的覺得好無助
我哭著問他到底是為什麼
他說他不知道 真的不知道
他又說 因為我太在意這件事
一直這樣讓他覺得好煩
然後我只能默默回房間哭
越哭越爬文越氣
但我真的好想解決問題
我只能確定的是:
他沒有其他女人
他愛的是女人沒錯
我們感情很好 有共同興趣話題
曾經提過找他一起看門診他拒絕了
我是已經下定決心生完要上健身房
雖然他一直說不是因為身材
我是不太相信 但他也從沒嫌過就是了
打完這篇再看著我熟睡的女兒
心情已經平靜了些
但是我真的好怕有朝一日
會因為這個理由讓我婚姻走不下去
想請問廣大的版友
我知道DIY 比較輕鬆
但是真的會對實戰完全沒興趣嗎?
我還能做甚麼努力?
有需要其他背景資料我可以再補充
先謝謝各位了
--
Tags:
婚姻
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