結束了,不能哭 - 婚姻

By Una
at 2015-10-05T00:15
at 2015-10-05T00:15
Table of Contents
有個很大的問題
感覺原PO認為小孩子會歸他??
不過看來小孩子歸夫家的機率比較高耶
畢竟都婆婆照顧
原PO離婚的話 有考慮這點嗎
※ 引述《cynthia1cat (籬落清秋)》之銘言:
: 首po,文長,先謝謝各位觀看
: (鞠躬
: ------------------------------------------
: 我想起了很多。
: 想起了交往之初,在家中聽見你的引擎聲時,那種期待的心情。
: 我想起了很多。
: 想起了交往之中,我生病臥床了三天,你寸步不離的悉心照料,看著你的背影,我心默默
: 的想,就是這個人了吧!
: 我想起了很多。
: 想起了結婚之前的那段日子,如同大多數情侶一樣,生活中開始出現大大小小的爭吵 ,
: 我認為我沒錯,你也覺得你說的不無道理,互不相讓的爭吵,讓這段感情變得越來越沉重
: 。
: 直到,女兒的出現。
: 這個突然降臨的小生命,把"我"變成了"我們",我們開始思考以前的相處模式哪裡出錯了
: ,我們意識到將有一個懵懵懂懂純潔無暇的小天使,全心全意的信任我們,並把我們當成
: 她的依靠,我們…將有一個家,屬於我們的家。
: 登記的那天,你握住我的手,告訴我婚姻是一種責任,我跟女兒都是,而我,是你的老婆
: 。
: 你以為故事到這邊就結束了嗎?喔不,這並不是童話故事。
: 正當我沉浸在幸福與期待之中,腦海中開始浮現對未來的各種美好想像之時,不免俗的遇
: 上了中華文化五千年未解之難題—婆媳問題。
: 套一句我老爸常說的,人因誤會而在一起,因了解而分開。你連跟家裡人都會吵架了,更
: 何況是和外面的人。
: 也許懷孕時的生理變化,真的會導致孕婦的情緒不穩定,結婚的第一個月,就把我婆婆跟
: 小姑通通得罪了個遍,氣的我當下就直接搬回娘家,直到孩子生下來。
: 離待產的日子越近,我的心情越煎熬,既期待又害怕,臍帶繞頸、羊水感染、麻醉過量等
: 等,新聞看越多越緊張,我就跟我老公商討,這個孩子當初你們都不要,是我堅持要生的
: ,這個孩子得跟我姓,而且我懷孕過程中,你的家人也不曾關心過我,我的孩子,不給他
: 們抱!
: 也許是老公心有愧疚,也許是其他我沒有考慮到的因素,當下,他回答好,你開心就好。
: 生產的那一天,在醫院,看見了我的親朋好友,也意外看見了許久未見的婆婆與小姑,說
: 真的,對於他們的加油打氣,除了說聲好,我實在不知道該用什麼心態去面對。
: 我是個很怕痛的人,躺在手術台上,眼淚嘩嘩的流,自己也搞不清楚是對未知的恐懼,還
: 是對即將到來的小生命而感動。
: 幫我接生的醫師說,「我接生過那麼多,你算哭的有前幾名了!」,我回答「雖然不會痛
: ,但是我知道你在切我!」
: 手術很成功,女兒在哇哇的哭聲中來到了這個世界,四肢健全,發育正常,體重標準,看
: 到她的第一眼,嗯…這個白白軟軟長的醜醜的就是我的孩子嗎?
: 很快的就到了出院的日子,在經歷了脹奶擠奶按子宮的痛苦後,準備前往月子中心休養,
: 婆婆也來了,住院住了六天,婆婆來了三天,雖然疙瘩還在,可是也有所軟化,至少那句
: 「媽」,我叫的出口了。
: 一直到我看見婆婆抱著我女兒的那一刻。婆婆臉上發自內心的笑容,好溫暖。
: 我有多久沒有好好的看看她了呢?什麼時候開始她的頭髮開始花白了?什麼時候開始她的
: 背影有老人的佝僂?又是什麼時候開始…她睡不好的呢?黑眼圈那麼深,是擔心她的兒子
: ,擔心我,還是都有?
: 在月子中心的生活雖然很舒適,寶寶跟三餐都有專人打理,可是坐牢式的五星級真的快把
: 我憋瘋了!不到半個月,我決定要回家。
: 回家後改請月子媽媽到府,一樣24H料理三餐加照顧寶寶,讓我意外的是,婆婆竟然連著
: 一個星期,天天騎腳踏車從家裡出發買菜送過來,婆家到娘家的距離,說長不長,說短也
: 不短,但一個六十歲的老人家每天這樣來回,人心都是肉長的,誰能不心疼?
: 我越來越掙扎女兒的姓氏問題,婆婆的歡喜是發自內心,沒有因為是女孩子而另眼相待,
: 但已經說好的跟我姓…?
: 一個月過去了,兩個月過去了,我們很有默契的誰也沒提起報戶口的事,直到戶政事務所
: 打電話來催促,他姐姐才知道孩子的姓氏我們另有打算,火冒三丈的打給我,劈頭蓋臉就
: 來一句「你不覺得你很過分嗎?欺負我們家是不是?啊?你這樣做覺得你對嗎?」等等邊
: 哭邊駡,聽的我火也起來了,我說「我過什麼分?我的小孩姓什麼我不能決定嗎?你自己
: 的孩子也是跟你姓,你吵什麼吵?我懷孕的時候讓你別在房間抽菸,你回答我什麼?你現
: 在憑什麼跟我吵我孩子跟誰姓!」
: 最後這件事因為婆婆出來了而不了了之,婆婆也說姓氏的問題,我們夫妻討論好就好,但
: 婆婆越是這樣說,我心裡越過意不去,最後我說,女兒跟爸爸姓,但是戶口要跟我,既不
: 讓老人家失望,也不會讓我當初的委屈沒個交代。
: 誰知道這時候我小姑又跳出來了,開口一樣是那一句「你不覺得你很過分嗎?你這樣別的
: 親戚會怎麼看我們!你家有錢了不起嗎!」
: 我只回答他「第一,孩子的事情爸媽決定很正常,沒有小姑決定這種東西,你想管,請管
: 你自己的兒子。第二,你會逢人就說"你看,這是我們家孫女,很可愛吧!可是她的戶口
: 不在我們家哦!"不會吧?你不說沒人會知道,而且別人也不在乎。第三,關我家有沒有
: 錢什麼事?我剖腹住院坐月子通通是我娘家媽媽出錢沒錯,不用你心懷感恩,但也沒道理
: 拿這個攻擊人吧?」
: 小姑不說話。
: 我接著說了,「我家裡的人都知道你弟弟家境沒有我家好,但我們都不在意,不然怎麼會
: 讓我嫁給你弟弟?我爸媽也說了,沒有聘金不辦酒席也沒關係,只要我們夫妻好好生活互
: 相照顧,這樣他們就安心了。」
: 小姑說:「我爸爸去世的早,我是要保護我的家人!」
: 我說:「保護家人很好,那我現在就不是你的家人嗎?而且我家有錢就該死?你偏見會不
: 會太重了?」
: 後來女兒照原先說的那樣,跟爸爸姓,戶口跟媽媽,小傻瓜不知道大人們為了她吵的亂七
: 八糟,還是笑的天真無邪。
: 說到這差不多說完了,但是我要特別感謝我婆婆,當了新手爸媽後才知道孩子有多難照顧
: ,她一哭,我們夫妻手忙腳亂還是應付不來。從滿月帶到現在快一歲,婆婆24H痛並快樂
: 著,這是原本該我做而她幫我做的事情,真的謝謝您。
: 再來謝謝我媽媽,從小我就是讓她最擔心掉最多眼淚的那一個,連嫁人了還擔心我過的太
: 辛苦,各種幫忙我們,媽媽,我愛你,只是可能又要讓你擔心一次了。
: 最後講重點,其實這篇文章是想告知各位親朋好友,由於價值觀不同,我和xxx先生經理
: 性溝通,確認彼此無法繼續生活,決議于10/5(一)辦理離婚手續,請各位親朋好友客觀看
: 待,抱持祝福的心情就好。
: 分開,是為了遇見更好的自己,與更好的別人,誰說不是呢?謝謝大家
--
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婚姻
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