工作跟婚姻的抉擇 - 婚姻
By Skylar Davis
at 2020-10-26T01:24
at 2020-10-26T01:24
Table of Contents
推 chen31 : 拿一個資源超少文化差異又大的小鎮當老婆新手村 10/25 22:50
→ chen31 : 然後再回頭來說老婆很廢,你會不會太苛刻啊 10/25 22:50
→ chen31 : 我自己年初剛搬到小鎮都覺得心驚膽跳 10/25 22:51
→ chen31 : 更何況是老婆完全人生地不熟無法融入還要帶小孩 10/25 22:51
你好 我同意我苛刻了點 但有些觀念容後補充
噓 Ilovecats : 你是根本沒有過過24小時帶小孩的日子才一直嫌人家太 10/26 00:13
→ Ilovecats : 太太廢吧!出張嘴很容易啦! 10/26 00:13
謝謝釣魚 這篇為了你回的 這餌我吃了(啊嗯)
你說的沒錯 我出張嘴嘴人家廢很容易
用你的邏輯回你 你出張嘴無視老公偏鄉小鎮上班朝7晚4回家還要睡眠6小時保衛戰的辛苦
無限上綱偏鄉小鎮家庭主婦全職育兒的辛苦 不也一樣容易嗎?
我並沒有說 家庭主婦是一件很輕鬆的事
我也沒有說 年薪四五十萬美元 對家裡的貢獻就一定比較偉大
因為對一個家庭而言 賺錢很重要 小孩的養育也很重要
這兩者之間 不能說誰比誰偉大
但我們先跳開我嘴你家事沒做好 你嘴我只會賺錢不體貼這個迴圈
我先溝通一個觀念
婚姻不是賣身契 (如果是就好了一切都簡單多了)
婚姻其實是開始,並不是結束
都說我在嘴女生 我先從男生開始嘴起好了
有些涉世尚淺的男生會有一個錯誤觀念 以為求婚成功的那一刻 一切就定案了
「我娶到她了 她是我的人了」
甚至跟朋友開玩笑說 結婚以後再禿頭啤酒肚 也沒關係了呀
反正都結婚了 哪有差
其實呢 一些心思比較暗黑的女生看到這邊應該心裡也是呵呵翻一個同情的白眼
這種認為 marriage means sex life for sure 的蠢觀念
通常就是這些傻男生求婚的初衷
然後呢 結婚以後放任自己劣化 不懂情趣 不懂維持身材 以為有帶錢回家就是一切
過幾年發現孩子不是自己的 或是孩子跟隔壁王叔叔特別親
或老婆跟健身房教練特別聊得來
直到失去這段婚姻都搞不懂為什麼
為什麼?因為後來你就沒跟上了
你以為你跑到終點了,其實下一段起跑線後你就停在原地了
同樣的道理
你覺得找一個年薪四五十萬美元也珍惜家庭婚姻的老公容易?
(原po文章問到怕為了工作賠上婚姻而考慮離職,我們姑且相信他是珍惜家庭)
還是找一個能夠全職育兒顧好家裡,能不給老公後顧之憂的老婆容易?
我講句賤一點的好了
有人文章在嘴稅後收入嘛
你身邊所有朋友
你找一個台幣年收六百萬以上 適婚年齡 願意娶你長的你也願意嫁的男生給我看看?
那同樣條件 他去問願意嫁他的女生 能不能好好把家庭顧好 你覺得有多少?
有的女生(注意 我不是說所有女生)會有一個錯誤觀念
我嫁到他了他就是我的
這句話 是 也不是
他還願意是你的 他就是你的
他不願意是你的 他隨時可以ditch你
不是他要ditch你,是你再也沒跟上而已
我這句話不是在嗆女生 上面先舉了嗆男生的例子了
這句話是適用在所有男女價值失衡的關係裡頭
你老公年薪千萬 他身邊所有女性朋友都在看你這個老婆是不是qualify 你知道嗎?(笑)
如果你不qualify 後面不用我多說什麼了吧
就我的經驗 女生思想暗黑的程度 比男生多的多了
如果世界上對於愛情的觀念 男生跟女生單純的人數 要我選哪邊多 我一定秒選男生
反正檯面上不會承認 要裝傻裝天真就請便吧 我看多了
回到上面討論
你以為你可以用婚姻關係予取予求
這句話 是 也不是
老公年薪千萬你家裡顧不好 你就只是用婚姻關係在做無理的要求勒索而已
「你根本不懂全職育兒的辛苦」
「你根本不懂什麼是產後憂鬱」
「你根本不懂我每天一個人在家壓力有多大」
那你又懂你先生朝7晚4 回到家還要跟你顧小孩整晚 每天上班睡眠6小時保衛戰的
辛苦 憂鬱 壓力了嗎~~~
現實本來就不是童話故事 人生本來就有各種辛苦 憂鬱 壓力
遇到了兩個一起扛起來 走下去
不是說你的分工我不能幫忙
但請你多少把自己的部分盡量負責好 不要跟著拖垮我的部分
老公年薪千萬了,只是請你把家裡顧好,拜託你跟上好嗎?
有人在那邊嘴 贍養費很高 老公不敢離啦
我只能說 你看到贍養費很高
但是賺錢能力永遠是在老公身上
離婚了 之後的二三十年 老公每年還是年收千萬
但老婆就是沒有賺錢能力 拿著這現在一筆/或是每年實現的贍養費而已
很抱歉 至少以原po例子 如果離婚兩個人都受傷 但受傷比較重的人絕對不會是老公
噓 Ilovecats : 孩子是一起生的,老公下班一起帶小孩做家事是應該的 10/26 00:18
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 哈囉 我愛貓小姐 同樣是你的噓文
如果你真心地相信 上班賺錢你的事 小孩兩個人帶很應該
那是你的婚姻觀 你老公沒意見 我們都不會有意見
我只祝福 你沒跟上 你的老公會回頭拉你 不會有一天離開你
你以為你可以用婚姻關係漫天要價
可以 當然可以
世界上也有些老公會買單
君不見多少醫生ATM 醫師娘每天下午微風打卡
但你最好期望你老公是其中之一
→ Ilovecats : ,不是恩賜好嗎?離鄉背井到美國偏鄉小鎮,本來就不 10/26 00:18
→ Ilovecats : 是每個人都能適應。老公有工作要衝,這是他一個很大 10/26 00:18
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ → Ilovecats : 的目標和生活重心,問題是老婆沒有啊!老婆人生只能 10/26 00:18
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ → Ilovecats : 面對新生兒、老公,再來?沒了。尤其看起來老婆是英 10/26 00:18
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 「老公有工作要衝,這是他一個很大的目標和生活重心,問題是老婆沒有啊!」
這句話聽起來你沒覺得老婆很廢?XD
你生活無聊是老公的義務?人生沒目標沒方向是老公的責任?
老公不但要賺千萬年薪養家 還要幫你找生活樂趣 人生目標方向?
我實在不知道這是老公 還是老爸 還是老師?XDDDD
→ Ilovecats : 文能力有限以致於不接受不會中文的保姆,那出問題也 10/26 00:18
→ Ilovecats : 是很可以理解的。10/26 00:19
不好意思 如果嫁到美國第二年 小孩也生了
英文能力不僅有限然後又沒進步
我真的很不能理解
在我看來 她真的沒跟上
--
Tags:
婚姻
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