父母的感情問題 - 婚姻
By Bethany
at 2019-12-09T00:38
at 2019-12-09T00:38
Table of Contents
是否同意記者抄文:YES/NO
各位婚姻版的前輩大家好,文長見諒
開頭先說明一下家中的背景
我的父母目前皆已年邁60
我的父親在我國中時期因為投資失利
損失了大部分的退休金
從那時候開始他就很少拿他的薪水貼補家用
每個月的薪水都拿去收拾投資失敗的殘局
因此一家五口的經濟壓力都落在我媽的身上
一直到小孩就業後家中的經濟才獲得緩解
事情發生在約兩個月前
我媽在我爸的帳戶發現過去有許多不尋常的借貸
且支出都是到某個女人的帳戶
沒錯,我爸可以說是外遇了10年有餘
雖然我爸說他從來沒有做出踰矩的行為(性行為)
但是在我們家裡經濟最艱難的時期他不但沒有幫忙
甚至還花了許多錢在別的女人身上(前後約100W)
其實這十年來我媽也不是沒有察覺
只是為了家庭的和諧不願意讓事情東窗事發
實在是因為事情的真相遠超過他的想像
因為我爸在7~8年前就被抓包過一次
當時也承諾不會再犯
但最後發現他又犯了且對象是同一個人
這十年間我媽可以說是默默承受了一切
今年滿60歲的她決定要為自己的人生而活
她揭發了這件事情並且要求我爸搬出家裡
(小孩都在外工作,平時只有兩老在家)
她不想跟我爸在同一個屋簷生活
我爸雖然在當下痛哭流涕甚至下跪道歉
也承諾未來不會再維持不當的關係
但我媽堅決要他搬出去住
因為看到他會讓她回想這2~30年來的痛苦
但矛盾的是我媽覺得這是他們兩老之間的恩怨
我們身為小孩還是要盡上孝道
如果從外地回家的時候還是要順道去觀望我爸
(我爸目前已搬出去)約他出來見面吃飯
身為小孩的我們當然也無法接受我爸過去的行為
但是總覺得如果約他出來見面吃飯
也無法回到過去相處的感覺
畢竟身為當事人的我媽並沒有原諒我爸
我們又怎麼能拋開這些成見而談笑風生呢?
我自己本身的想法是在我媽原諒之前
不再找我爸出來見面
但是我媽覺得我是在逼她原諒我爸
她不希望他們的恩怨影響我爸在我們心中的地位
但說不影響是騙人的
除非我媽能原諒他我們也才能對這件事情釋懷
大家贊成我們勸和父母嗎?
還是就像我媽堅持的不要管他們的恩怨
在我們回家的時候約父親出來見面呢?
--
各位婚姻版的前輩大家好,文長見諒
開頭先說明一下家中的背景
我的父母目前皆已年邁60
我的父親在我國中時期因為投資失利
損失了大部分的退休金
從那時候開始他就很少拿他的薪水貼補家用
每個月的薪水都拿去收拾投資失敗的殘局
因此一家五口的經濟壓力都落在我媽的身上
一直到小孩就業後家中的經濟才獲得緩解
事情發生在約兩個月前
我媽在我爸的帳戶發現過去有許多不尋常的借貸
且支出都是到某個女人的帳戶
沒錯,我爸可以說是外遇了10年有餘
雖然我爸說他從來沒有做出踰矩的行為(性行為)
但是在我們家裡經濟最艱難的時期他不但沒有幫忙
甚至還花了許多錢在別的女人身上(前後約100W)
其實這十年來我媽也不是沒有察覺
只是為了家庭的和諧不願意讓事情東窗事發
實在是因為事情的真相遠超過他的想像
因為我爸在7~8年前就被抓包過一次
當時也承諾不會再犯
但最後發現他又犯了且對象是同一個人
這十年間我媽可以說是默默承受了一切
今年滿60歲的她決定要為自己的人生而活
她揭發了這件事情並且要求我爸搬出家裡
(小孩都在外工作,平時只有兩老在家)
她不想跟我爸在同一個屋簷生活
我爸雖然在當下痛哭流涕甚至下跪道歉
也承諾未來不會再維持不當的關係
但我媽堅決要他搬出去住
因為看到他會讓她回想這2~30年來的痛苦
但矛盾的是我媽覺得這是他們兩老之間的恩怨
我們身為小孩還是要盡上孝道
如果從外地回家的時候還是要順道去觀望我爸
(我爸目前已搬出去)約他出來見面吃飯
身為小孩的我們當然也無法接受我爸過去的行為
但是總覺得如果約他出來見面吃飯
也無法回到過去相處的感覺
畢竟身為當事人的我媽並沒有原諒我爸
我們又怎麼能拋開這些成見而談笑風生呢?
我自己本身的想法是在我媽原諒之前
不再找我爸出來見面
但是我媽覺得我是在逼她原諒我爸
她不希望他們的恩怨影響我爸在我們心中的地位
但說不影響是騙人的
除非我媽能原諒他我們也才能對這件事情釋懷
大家贊成我們勸和父母嗎?
還是就像我媽堅持的不要管他們的恩怨
在我們回家的時候約父親出來見面呢?
--
Tags:
婚姻
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