如何調適自己的心情? - 結婚
By Wallis
at 2016-03-20T00:50
at 2016-03-20T00:50
Table of Contents
延續上面一篇文,從頭到尾,婚顧這件事我都不知情,
等到我知道的時候,是我未來婆婆傳了張她跟婚顧討論好的流程圖(訂金已付)
光是婚禮要不要請樂團,我與男友都持反對意見,
她就已不爽嗆聲那就我們自己辦(樂意之至),但我們明顯知道那只是威脅。
所以婚禮流程這件事,我也打算不再插手,只要求我男友去跟他媽說哪幾個部份我不要
,拿掉就好,剩下的未來婆婆要怎麼弄就怎麼弄。
但是。。。我男友告訴我,我未來婆婆希望我自己去跟她溝通,
因為未來婆婆的同學的小孩都會打給我未來婆婆跟她訴說心事,討論婚禮,
甚至連他女友未婚懷孕,都是先跟我未來婆婆說!
所以我未來婆婆覺得我為什麼不能像那個小孩一樣?(但我未來婆婆怎麼不會想說那她
怎麼不去跟他媽講?根本不是因為我未來婆婆如她所說這麼開明!!而是事不關己!!)
我男友告訴他媽,我的個性本來就是如此,我跟我媽也是這樣,
我未來婆婆竟告訴他,既然我要嫁進去她家,那我就要融入她家的生活方式。
我告訴我男友,不可能,我的個性就是如此,為何我結婚就要改變?
我當然會把他的父母當長輩,但長輩對我來說,一如我的父母,我永遠是報喜不報憂,
但我未來婆婆這樣講就算了,我男友竟然跟我說,如果我不改變,要我自己去跟我未來
婆婆就我要不要直接找他媽溝通的這件事討論出一個共識,
否則他說他像天平一樣,左邊不能站,右邊也不能站
我好痛苦.......交往時就知道這問題,我未來的婆婆控制慾強到不是常人所能想像
我男友到現在3X歲了,每天起床要說起床,去哪裡要LINE,吃什麼要LINE
晚上要打電話說晚安(至少聊半小時以上),幾乎大小事都要報告,
我未來婆婆說這叫分享....如果只是分享而已,為何睡太晚沒打電話要生氣,
一天沒打電話要爆走! 我與男友相約去過他的生日(非當天,前一個周末),
我未來婆婆那天跟我說感謝我帶我男友去走走,過了幾天,跟我男友說,
她辛辛苦苦把小孩養這麼大,她也想要跟他過30歲生日
這一切....其實都讓我很害怕,我明確的知道我從小獨立,不是可以被控制的
但我男友一直告訴我,他媽要掌控他是不可能的,反正以後也不會住在一起!
但現在,很明顯,我男友似乎沒辦法替我擋下,反而要我自己去面對...
我好害怕婚後會變得怎麼樣....
(抱歉 文長,把糟糕的情緒帶給開心在準備結婚的各位)
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結婚
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