如何對待這樣態度的家人 - 家庭
By Ida
at 2011-08-22T11:45
at 2011-08-22T11:45
Table of Contents
昨天跟弟弟類似像攤牌一樣的激烈爭吵了一番
起因是因為弟弟年底要結婚,計畫婚禮時,希望我跟媽媽能牽著他走紅毯出場
我跟媽媽都不願意,基本理由是沒看過婚禮新郎有人牽出場的,重點擺在新娘就好
弟弟的說法是這是他的婚禮,不管別人、習俗怎麼做,他!就是要這樣做。
我後來誠懇地再跟他說一次,不想這樣安排,不需要因為父親過世,就要特別安排
我跟媽媽走紅毯,我們乖乖做主桌就好,需要我幫忙其他的都可以,弟弟不聽..
為了這件事跟我冷戰N星期 媽媽看不下去要他停止這樣的態度
昨天弟弟跟準媳婦到我家來,針對這件事情我希望再說一次,讓他不要再生氣
弟弟開始哭訴,他覺得這世上只有我這個姊姊,姊姊不答應,他非常傷心難過
我告訴他,要我幫其他婚禮的忙都可以,什麼招待跑腿都可以,弟弟冷笑著說
那些都不用你做,準媳婦家一堆人搶著做,何況我們家又沒請任何人,客人我一個
也不認識..
我跟弟弟說,這種事情不能商量嗎?你只有給我一種選擇,我說不要,你就這樣生氣
弟弟講,對!我就是這樣,你如果包容我,我才要包容你
這世界上的人,同意我的就是我的朋友,不同意我的就是我的敵人
我說,我們姊弟這麼多年,難道為這一件事情值得這麼生氣嗎?我是你姊姊耶
他說,不用拿姊姊壓我,我跟你是平輩,我尊重的只有媽媽,我沒必要尊重你
接下來弟弟就開始一連串發表自己對世界黑白分明、唯我獨尊的想法......
很訝異自己的弟弟會是這麼偏激的想法,而且就是明擺著講不用尊重姊姊,
我從小都是在父母責備下長大,什麼事情都是要讓著弟弟,因為弟弟年紀小,
連弟弟貪玩功課不好,也是姊姊的錯,姊姊自私只顧自己讀書不管弟弟,
我安排時間要教弟弟功課,到上課時間,弟弟還在看電視玩耍,被罵的人還是我
讀書讀這麼多有什麼用,我爸以前說~唉~以為你讀多點書會有點用,你要想方法啊
想方法讓你弟讀書啊...
等弟弟交了女友,帶女友回舊家住,舊家因為房子結構只要風大,洗澡時就會
有一點瓦斯倒灌到家裡的味道,某日我在浴室洗澡時,剛好外面刮大風
準媳婦就非常恐慌的說怎麼會有瓦斯味...是不是外洩什麼的,
其實只有一點點味道而已,而且是我們家長年的狀況...我媽跟我弟聯合
對著浴室大吼,你洗什麼熱水啊,洗澡不會洗冷水嗎,要弄到房子整個爆炸嗎?
你趕快給我出來,不要再洗了!!
我...當時在浴室真的是氣到發抖,這是我家,我的家人卻為了一個外人這樣對我,
從那天起我就發誓要搬家,我躲開總行了吧...看開了..
搬家前還先換了防風熱水器..花了快一萬,然後開始找房子自己搬出去住....
其實那陣子曾經氣到想一了百了,家人都這樣了,活著還有什麼意思,後來轉念想想
搬出去就好了,想開點,躲開就沒事了
對弟弟再忍讓再照顧,做到今天,最後弟弟還是這樣的態度,
只要順他意,什麼都好談,不順他意,不用說什麼姊弟情誼,就是翻臉不認人....
昨天聽他說這一番話,讓我好震驚又傷心..面對自己弟弟這樣態度,
以後我應該要怎麼做?
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