Re: 實在是太過分了! - 婚姻
By Todd Johnson
at 2010-03-30T10:02
at 2010-03-30T10:02
Table of Contents
原PO啊,我是覺得妳積怨已久了啦。
我看文的感覺是,妳會下意識去做一些對老公不利的動作,
用這些動作小小的抒發一下平時的壓抑與怒氣。
現在有了孩子就更可以用孩子做藉口。
因為有孩子,所以讓老公進不了電梯,噴灑藥劑時對他視而不見,
讓孩子玩球也可以K到他。你們生活裡一定常常出現類似的狀況。:p
為什麼我會這樣說?
因為,很有趣的,是當對方指責妳的時候,妳並不是生氣以及反駁而已,
妳現在在談的是妳在日常生活裡對他的不滿,所有的不滿。
這些事情講坦白話確實明明就是妳不小心或沒注意或放任讓其發生,
當然啦,妳老公的反應太誇張了一點......
不過,妳不覺得妳延伸出來的抱怨其實跟這些事情都無關嗎?
一般人的反應當下應該是道歉,
若對方表現出來的態度是用攻擊的方式,應該是會生氣,
而且會跟對方說----你話不能好好講嗎?
但妳在平常時候卻沒有,或說是沒能力跟老公透露出「你話不能好好講嗎?」
以及其他的內心碎碎唸。所以只能從這些方式來一點一滴釋放怒氣吧!
所以妳就......
「 我沒問他就噴的原因是 我筆電剛被亂丟我不想跟他說話
而且他正睡著打呼著 我也不想叫醒他
而且我也不想等他離開再噴
他對我這樣 雖然我不是蓄意報復
但我也沒想過要等他離開再噴
當時我只想著我小孩而已 」
這是妳寫的內文。我想一切都很清楚喔。:)
還有,夫妻間之事請好好解決,不要拿小孩當藉口。
否則等孩子大一點,小孩會變成妳對抗甚或報復老公的工具。
妳老公確實情緒控管以及個性上有很大的問題。
但這男人是妳自己選的,請好好溝通,溝通不成也拜託請好好吵一架。
不敢直接面對,又不敢吵架,只敢下意識的做一些小動作激怒老公。
(妳對別人會這樣神經大條嗎?我不信)
然後再來很無辜的說「這些都只是小事嘛,你發這麼大脾氣幹嘛?」
妳想說的真的只是這些而已嗎?
這樣長此以往真的不是一個健康的相處模式。
現在結婚只是三五年,但未來還有幾十年要過。
除非妳要離婚。但我想若真的要離開,請先學會「溝通」這門課程再走也不遲。
--
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婚姻
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